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Wednesday, August 1, 2012

My New Vibrator, My New Paper Weight

Before I begin, I would like to give all of you owners of both adult toys and dogs a bit of advice; make sure that you put your toys, particularly your favorite ones, out of your pooch's reach. I'm usually really good about putting toys away after I have washed them, but a few weeks ago I left my Smart Balls out on top of my "toy" chest and my dog, Ginger, discovered them, since it was at an accessible height for her, and decided to make them her new chew toy. I came home after work to find one of the balls had been chewed open and the weight that goes inside was nowhere to be found (and I wasn't about to start checking my dog's poop for it).


Fortunately, the Smart Balls are relatively inexpensive, so I don't mind replacing them, but it's still annoying. So remember, dogs love toys that are chewy, so silicone adult toys are just silicone dog toys to them. Keep your toys in a drawer(s), plastic bin, chest, padlocked safe, or anywhere that a dog can't open up and get to them. Now on to this month's review!


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Today I'll be reviewing the Goddess Dual Clitoral and G-Spot Stimulator by Blush Novelties.

After a night of partying with a friend that was visiting from out of town, I came home and noticed I had a package waiting for me on my doorstep. I was pleasantly surprised and knew right away what was waiting for me in the package. I decided to leave the package unopened and went to bed; after all, it WAS three in the morning. When day-time came, and my dog decided it was time to wake me up so that we could go out for her morning walk, I opened up the package and took out my new pink vibrator. At first touch I was already really exciting, mainly because the feel of the silicone was really smooth and pleasant to the touch. Even my out-of-town friend agreed that it felt nice as she briefly examined the toy. Unfortunately, though, I had to wait a couple of nights before I would get a chance to try out this new toy. As much as I love my friend, I don't think that she would have appreciated me using the toy in my studio apartment while she was staying with me.

After my friend left, and the suspense had been sufficiently built up, I finally got a chance to spend the night with my new friend. I lubed up the head of the toy and went to town. The Goddess has seven different vibrating functions, all controlled by one button that's close to the clitoral stimulator. After about two minutes of using the toy, I realized that it wasn't really doing anything for me. I thought that it was possible that I just wasn't "turned on" and needed to watch some porn to assist with getting in the mood. After a short while of watching some porn, I quickly realized that the lack of porn was not the issue. I played with the various vibration settings, and still nothing. I quickly realized that the vibrations were just not strong enough. The shaft of the toy vibrates nicely, but the head, the part that's supposed to be hitting your G-spot, only faintly vibrates. The same thing goes for the clitoral stimulator, the vibrations were just not strong enough. I eventually gave up and decided to bring in another toy into the mix, my handy Layaspot. A few moments after incorporating the new toy, my Goddess DIED!!! Well, it stopped working. I thought that it was probably the batteries, so I just took them out and put them back in and it started working again. But this revival was short lived, a few minutes later the Goddess stopped working for a second time. At this point I decided to give up and give this toy another go on another occasion. 

About a week passed before I decided to try out the Goddess again. Unfortunately, this second time around, even with my low expectations, was still a poor experience. After about 15 minutes of using the toy it stopped working, again, and realized that the motor was getting over worked. I stopped and decided to just finish myself off with my Rabbit. I don't know if I'll really be using this toy much more, aside from just using it as a paper weight, but I know that it's not a good solo toy, and due to the thickness of the shaft, it's not really a good partner toy when being penetrated vaginally. Now, if you want to get penetrated anally while the Goddess is inside you, then it MIGHT be an alright toy, but I have yet to try that out.

All in all, the Goddess Dual Clitoral and G-Spot Stimulator by Blush Novelties sadly gets a "DilDon't" from yours truly. Now, if you don't require strong vibrations, then this toy might work for you, but it did not for me. The good thing about this toy, though, is that it was a fairly inexpensive toy, so not much of an investment was made on my new paper weight.

Until next time, stay excited!




***If you have a story you would like to share please email me. Also, if you have any suggestions for future adult toy reviews, topics, or questions please feel free to post them in the comments section or email me at DilDosNDilDonts@gmail.com***

2 comments:

  1. woot! I made the blog as "out of town friend"! Sorry the toy didn't work out, it was very soft.

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    1. I think that at some point everyone will make an appearance :P. Yeah, I was pretty bummed because I was really excited about it. But I still like to just touch it due to how soft it is, hahaha. I should make it a paper weight at work, I'm sure that would be appropriate :P.

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