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Wednesday, May 30, 2012

One Night Stand

What usually happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, unless you’re me and insist on letting people know way too much about your sex life.

In July of 2009, my cousin, whom I'll refer to as D, her friend, whom I'll refer to as E, and myself met up with my friend, R, and her group in Las Vegas, Nevada. I was there because we were celebrating my cousin's 22nd birthday. The first night we were there we met up with R who was staying at the Luxor. As we were getting ready to go out, R went down to the lobby to score us some wristbands to get into LAX nightclub for free and drink some free champagne. Prior to heading out to the club, we all started pre-partying in the room. Several tequila shots and mixed drinks in, we headed out for the night. If I'm not mistaken, we had a one hour window in which we were able to partake of the free libations. We each got a glass of champagne, toasted, and drank. It was some pretty cheap and nasty tasting stuff, but it was free, so we just continued to drink until we couldn't taste how awful it was. Within the time in which we were able to get free drinks, we must have consumed at least a bottle each.

The rest of the night is a bit harder to recall, so please bare with me on some of the facts. Whenever I discuss that evening with R and D we all agree that it was almost as if we were living out the movie The Hangover. One minute I was getting drinks for everyone and we were all dancing with guys and just having a general good time, the next minute I'm missing and R is freaking out because she doesn't know where I went. To be quite honest I don't really know how and when I left the club, but I do know that I ended up in the room of the guy I was dancing with. The moment I realized what was happening was when he and I were undressing to have sex. I recall taking off his clothes and going down on him, and then him reciprocating the act.One thing that I can vividly recall is this guy's gifted ability at cunnilingus; just thinking about how good he was is starting to make me a bit hot and bothered.

When we were done with the foreplay, the sex began. This person that I was about to sleep with, not only did he give great head, but was also very well endowed, I felt like I hit the jackpot with this one night stand. Whoever this person was, it was as if he knew what I liked. The sex was rough when it needed it to be, gentle in the end, and just fun and exciting all in between. I do feel that it's important to mention that we did use a condom. Also, after this experience, I proceeded to get tested just to make sure that I didn't get anything from this guy, which I didn't. Yay safety! After everything was said and done, I got dressed and attempted to figure out where I was and where D, R, and E were. Fortunately, R saw me from across the building and flagged me down. Needless to say, she was upset and tired, as was my cousin, who was probably more drunk than anything else. D, E and myself ended up catching a cab and heading back to our hotel to sleep it all out. D was the one that mentioned that the night reminded her of The Hangover, which was true, to a certain extent; I'm just glad I didn't end up locked up on a roof.

Oh, I almost forgot, after he and I were done with sex I sort of passed out, briefly, and later discovered that he took my cousin's camera, which I was holding in my boobs for safekeeping the entire night, and proceeded to take pictures of me lying naked. Unfortunately, D got a glimpse of those pictures; sorry about that. But she promptly deleted them and called me to tell me about it when she discovered them several weeks later. Unfortunately, I sort of told her that nothing happened, but that was because I had never done anything like this before. I was ashamed of what I had done, and felt like I couldn't really tell anyone. But in retrospect, I don't mind recounting this sexual experience. I consented to the sex, I was safe, and I still went and got tested after the whole experience. Regardless of what your sexscapades are or are not, the most important thing is your safety and your consenting to the sex.

Until next time, stay excited!

***If you have a story you would like to share please email me. Also, if you have any suggestions for future adult toy reviews, topics, or questions please feel free to post them in the comments section or email me at DilDosNDilDonts@gmail.com***

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

M is for Masturbation

I’ve written two adult toy reviews and I have written about my first experience with masturbation, but I haven’t written about how important it is for a woman to masturbate. I honestly believe that I’m as laid back as I am because of how much I masturbate. I’m not a tense person, and I know that I’m generally in a good mood, which I believe I can attribute to how often I “relieve my stress”.

A few years back, one of my good friends, whom I love to pieces, was being a bit of a grump and snapping at friends. She and her boyfriend had broken up a while ago at this point, meaning that she also hadn’t had sex in quite some time. As far as I knew, and from what she had revealed to me, she hadn’t really done any masturbating, and as time passed since she gotten any she was just becoming more and more irritable. After a while, and after noticing that one friend in particular was her main target to snap at, I sat her down and suggested that she go home and masturbate. She was a bit resistant at first, mainly because of her living situation, but she finally agreed to take my advice. I don’t recall the exact amount of time that lapsed from when I sat her down to when she actually took my advice, but after she did masturbate she came up to me and told me that she was feeling a lot better. All of us noticed a difference in her as well, not to mention that her grumpiness had pretty much completely dissipated.

On a few occasions I have come to discover that masturbating has helped me with headaches and insomnia. Masturbation as a way to help with my insomnia was almost a given, considering that a great orgasm does take a bit out of you and leaves you feeling completely relaxed afterwards. But nonetheless, I highly recommend it if you’re tossing and turning and don’t have a partner to assist with the pleasure/relaxation; sometimes you just have to take matters into your own hand. 

Like I mentioned in my review for the Layaspot, I sometimes drive home while using my Layaspot. The majority of the occasions in which I masturbate on my way home from work are due to work induced headaches, which are the worst. By the time I get home I’m usually headache free and in a chipper mood. Now, I'm not saying you should masturbate when you're driving, it can potentially be a safety hazard, especially if you're extra sensitive and can't really multi-task, but masturbating after a long day at work is never a bad idea.

Another benefit to masturbation is discovering where on your body you like to be touched, rubbed, licked, and caressed. You get to take your time to find out how much pressure you require in order to cum, or what areas on your body you would rather your partner stay away from. On that same note, you get to discover what an orgasm actually is. The majority of women can’t cum with just penetration, I’ve been fortunate enough to have cum with just penetration on a few occasions, but that was the exception and definitely not the rule. Unless you have a partner that’s more than willing to please you and make sure that you finish after he’s done, then chances are that you won’t know what an orgasm is like unless you find the time to masturbate and discover what cumming is like.

So ladies, if you notice that you have been extra irritable, take some time to pleasure yourself. If you’ve had a stressful day and have a headache, take some time to pleasure yourself. If you’re having trouble sleeping, take some time to pleasure yourself. And most importantly, if you’re not sure if you’ve ever experienced an orgasm, FOR GOODNESS SAKE PLEASE TAKE SOME TIME TO PLEASURE YOURSELF!!! 

Until next time, stay excited!

***If you have a story you would like to share please email me. Also, if you have any suggestions for future adult toy reviews, topics, or questions please feel free to post them in the comments section or email me at DilDosNDilDonts@gmail.com***

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

And now, time to address some comments

This past week has been a hectic one, which means that I’ve had little to no time to come up with a topic and write. For this reason I decided that instead of posting something new I will instead respond to some comments made to me about my previous posts.

My Bathtub and Me:
After reading this blog post, a friend of mine asked if I knew what sex was at the time I first started masturbating. I can pretty much affirm that I had NO clue what sex was, or that having “urges” to satisfy yourself meant that you were horny. I did what I did because it felt good to me and I wasn’t hurting myself, or anyone else for that matter. But after my mom caught me I knew that I wasn’t supposed to do it, I just wasn’t aware as to why it was something wrong to do.

Another friend thanked me for being honest about the age I was when I started masturbating. Although, he thanked me because he felt guilty for having done the same thing and felt like he wasn’t alone. I’m pretty sure that there are more of us that started humping, grinding, and touching ourselves at a young age; we just probably don’t remember it. Maybe, due to being caught by our parents and being reprimanded, we stopped making ourselves feel good and repressed those memories. Whatever the case may be, I’m almost certain that my friend and I are not alone when it comes to doing things at a young age that makes our bodies feel good.

The Doc Johnson I-Vibe Rabbit aka My First Vibrator!:
One friend pointed out that I didn’t mention that I broke my first Rabbit. As I re-read that blog post I noticed that I did mention that I had to replace it because I had over used it. Well, I guess my friend wanted me to be a little more obvious about that fact.

After owning the Rabbit for just about over a year, I wore out the motor on my beloved toy. I tried to take it apart to see if there was anything I could do to try to fix it, but I wasn’t a mechanical engineer and failed at my attempt to fix my Rabbit. I didn’t know that you can overuse a toy; I think that’s probably why I have several now, so that I can rotate them and not worry about wearing them down.

Sexual Assault Awareness Month:
After I posted this story I’ve had a number of people open up about the times that they were sexually assaulted. One person in particular opened up about the trauma that she’s still experiencing from her assault. She feels that her marriage is suffering sexually because there are certain sexual acts that can trigger a memory of the assault. Because of that she and her husband haven’t really been able to expand their sexual horizons. Also, she sometimes feels disgusting during sex, and a bit guilty if she enjoys it, which are all feelings that she has recognized come from the trauma of the attack. She recommended I touch on that topic, enjoying sex after an attack, in a future post, which I definitely plan on doing.

The War on Women:
I was surprised that I didn’t get any feedback, whether it be on one side of the political spectrum or the other, on this post. I think that I’ll just leave this one alone.

Virginity:This blog post opened up a whole can of worms with multiple ex-partners. I’ve had at the VERY least five different people contact me and either try to buddy up with me, apologize, or just express concern about the possibility of being subject matter for a future post. I’m going to say this, I will definitely not be naming names, and only you, and my VERY close friends, will know when I write about you. Every experience I have had is fair game for future posts. Now, I don’t intend on just talking crap about everyone, that’s not the person that I am, and that’s not my style. What I do plan on doing is being honest. If you were an asshole and I had great sex with you then I will post that you were an asshole and I had great sex with you. If you were a sweetheart and we had vanilla sex, then I’ll probably post that you were a sweetheart but the sex just wasn’t that great.

I’ve had a variety of sexual experiences that were paired up with a wide range of personalities. I have also gotten my heart a little broken on numerous occasions, but that doesn’t mean that I’m going to tear you a new one. My suggestion, if after reading this you still have reason to be afraid of what I might post, then I think that that’s saying more about you than it is about me.

The Layaspot by Fun Factory, Your BFF on Long Car Rides:Yes, I do drive with this toy. I did not fabricate that story. I also use it when I’m at home sitting at my desk and using my computer. I’ve also recommended this toy to my friends and family more than any other; that might have something to do with some women preferring clitoral stimulation and how versatile this toy is.

Talk Dirty to Me:
It was suggested that I include where you do and do not like to be licked to the list of topics you and your partner should talk about. The list I posted was definitely not an extensive one, so feel free to add topics of conversation that best fit you and your partner.

I’m pretty sure that I addressed all of the important comments that were made about those particular posts. If you have anything else to add please feel free to let me know.

Until next time, stay excited!

***If you have a story you would like to share please email me. Also, if you have any suggestions for future adult toy reviews, topics, or questions please feel free to post them in the comments section or email me at DilDosNDilDonts@gmail.com***

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Talk Dirty to Me

I know that you have heard it time and time again; communication is the key to a healthy relationship. Well, this could not be truer when it comes to communicating about sex before, during, and after sex. Aside from communicating during sex with “sexy talk”, which can be really hot, the communication that comes before the sex is just as important, especially when it comes to setting boundaries for what you are or are not comfortable doing in the bedroom. 
I love rough sex. I’m a fan of just taking it and being told what to do, having my hair pulled, and being spanked and lightly bit. I also love to dirty talk prior to sex in public places; being told what’s going to happen to me and how I’m going to be “punished” is a HUGE turn on and a great form of foreplay. You wouldn’t know this about me just by looking at me, so how do you think that my last few partners knew to do this in order to ensure that I had a very pleasurable sexual experience? I told them about it. I set boundaries for what words they couldn’t use when talking dirty; I’m not a fan of being called a bitch during the sexy talk. My partners also knew that I wasn’t that big of a fan of anal sex, although I’ve been recently reconsidering trying it again, so they never attempted to do it or brought it up. The point I’m making is that communication is the key to a great sexual relationship.

Prior to my now candid nature with my partners about what I enjoy in the bedroom, I would just do the deed and not really bother to let my partner know, neither before nor after sex, what the things that I enjoyed the most were. This was a big mistake on my part because I’m quite the submissive during sex. When a partner would ask me what I wanted to have done to me I would go into “super-freak-out-silence-mode”. Needless to say, it took a while before I was able to communicate during sex. I think that my silence came from not really knowing what I wanted and liked, but also from wanting a partner to just take control and have their way with me, yet I didn’t communicate this. Little by little, though, as the amount of sex I had increased, I began to realize what I liked and that most guys have no clue what a woman really enjoys in bed. But to be fair about that statement, most women want different things.

Talking about sex before you have it is also a great way to explore each other’s wild side, as well as test what boundaries might or might not be ok to cross. I used to sleep with a friend that wanted a finger or two up his butt during oral sex, and he was completely candid about this. I was fine with obliging to his request and it made sex a lot more fun for the both of us. On another occasion, I was sleeping with a guy that liked to pinch my nipples, but before he proceeded to pinch them he asked if it was ok, I told him he could do it but I would let him know when it was too much. During that sexual experience I found out that I like my nipples pinched and bit, but the fact that he asked for permission is what really made that experience hot.

It’s important to note that you should probably not go to your partner and start listing things that you don’t like during sex. Keeping things in a more positive light and giving suggestions for alternative experiences to the ones that you’re not a fan of, that way no one’s ego gets hurt, is probably the best way to go about things. Now, if you tell someone that you would rather they do something else instead of continuing with what they’re doing, but they don’t listen to you, then you should definitely put your foot down and say that you don’t like what they’re doing. Consent is sexy, but if your partner tries to do something that you have said you’re not too keen on doing then you should definitely feel comfortable to say that you do not like something.
To get you started, here are a few things that you should consider talking to your partner about: 

 1) Fantasies 
 2) Where you like for them to cum (for those with male partners)
 3) Whether or not you like cum in your mouth
 4) Positions you favor
 5) Toys you would like to use during sex
 6) Your thoughts on role playing
 7) Places that you like to have sex (public vs private)
 8) Foreplay
 9) Oral sex
 10) Mutual Masturbation
 11) Anal sex
 12) Bondage or more extreme forms of S&M

These were just a few suggestions, but I'm sure that you all can come up with more. Please feel free to leave your suggestions for topics to talk about with your partners in the comments section, I'm sure other people would appreciate it ;).

Until next time, stay excited! 

***If you have a story you would like to share please email me. Also, if you have any suggestions for future adult toy reviews, topics, or questions please feel free to post them in the comments section or email me at DilDosNDilDonts@gmail.com***

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

The Layaspot by Fun Factory, Your BFF on long car rides

Two Fridays ago I was stuck in some of the crappiest traffic one could ever be stuck in. What is normally about an hour commute turned into a three and a half hour NIGHTMARE! The entire time that I was on the road I was thinking of how I could have somewhat enjoyed this frustrating situation had I just brought my Layaspot with me. Well, needless to say, ever since that day, I have not left home without it, just in case I find myself in another traffic jam from hell.

The Layaspot, by Fun Factory, is a waterproof, ergonomic and powerful external vibrator that comes in a plethora of colors and has a “little motor that could” that is sure to pleasure your erogenous zone. Crafted in Germany, with elastomed, the hypo-allergenic material is both soft to the touch and easy to clean. The great thing about this toy is its easy-to-use functions. To turn it on simply press and hold the + button, and to experience any of the eight vibration intensities simply continue to press the same button. After you have reached the maximum vibration level, press and hold the + button again to experience any of the three different pulsations. To turn it off press the – button until you get to the lowest vibration intensity then press and hold until the toy turns off. 

Because of the ergonomic shape, driving while using this toy is easy; hell, sitting with it in general is easy (I may or may not be using my Layaspot as I write this). Whenever I speak to friends or family about driving with the Layaspot I get looks of concern. One of the questions I’m constantly asked is, “won’t you get into a car accident because you’re not concentrating?” which is a valid concern. The truth is that I am fully capable of multi-tasking. My eyes never leave the road, and the excitement of masturbating in public makes the experience extra sensual and fun. Needless to say, the times that I have used it on my way to work have resulted in me being in a lighter mood while at work. On a few occasions, when I didn’t use it on my drive to work, I would use the Layaspot while on my way home due to a headache. I would arrive home headache free and ready to take my dog out on a hike.

Another advantage to the shape of the Layaspot is how easy it is to use with a partner, particularly a male-bodied partner. Any position where the female is laying down during penetration allows the Layaspot to rest on the clitoris. If the toy is being used during a missionary position, the man’s body weight can even assist in the added pressure of the Layaspot on the clitoris, therefore enhancing the sensation.

One of the few cons about this toy is that, for it’s size, it’s a fairly pricey toy, ranging between $45 to about $60. It’s not a rechargeable toy, so rechargeable batteries are HIGHLY recommended; I went through at least three different battery charges in the month of April. Also, although the Fun Factory touts the silence of the motor, I feel that the toy is still fairly loud for how small it is. But then again, that’s the small price to pay for how powerful the Layaspot is.

The Layaspot by Fun Factory is probably my favorite small vibe. I felt that the monetary investment I made in this toy was very much worth it. This vibrator definitely gets a big “DilDo” and is also highly recommended by yours truly.

If you own a Layaspot, let me know your thoughts on this product in the comments section.

Until next time, stay excited!

If you have a story you would like to share please email me. Also, if you have ay suggestions for future adult toy reviews, topics, or questions please feel free to post them in the comments section or email me at DilDosNDilDonts@gmail.com.